The Expectation

There is a scene in the film 40 Days and 40 Nights in which Josh Hartnett brings Shannyn Sossamon to orgasm with only a flower. This scene is...

The Beat Goes On

This guy had just told a joke and Stella was mid-laugh, her mouth frozen open in a snapshot when she saw something across the bar. Excusing herself from...

The Kinks in Kampala’s Cocks

There is a guy in Muyenga; living on his own in a really great house, apparently no wife and kids, I met him at a charity event...

Hate the Player and the Game

Ice-T said “Don’t hate the player, hate the game”. Fuck him. I say hate the player and the game. We are a bunch of pathetic fuckers. Teargas...

The Network

He was hanging up the phone as J walked up to him. He stood up, widening his arms to welcome her in a hug; all one long,...

Fantasizing Without The Cabbage

was sending flirty texts to a potential lover when he asked me: <So what’s yr fantasy?> (If you’re not the type of person who texts in proper English, never...

Cabbages: A Safeword During Sex

As he was taking off my clothes he said, “What should we use as a safeword?” “Ummm, how about ‘no’.” I responded, between kisses. The idea of me yelling “Cabbages....

UMEME Romance

That Sunday, escaping the chokingly dull atmosphere at lunch with the relas, Trish had gone to watch her cousin play football. It was there that she slowly...

The Loathe Letters

Dear guy who I was slightly obsessed with last year. You would roll into town from Kenya and somehow impress me with your company expense account, and...

Hiking Away

The hitchhiker has not had sex in months I know, I know. Up is left and down is right. The pope is boning Paris Hilton and Lexington Steele...

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