UMEME Increases Electricity Rates On Idea Bulb


The cost of thinking sensibly in Uganda has shot up sorely after the sole electricity company in the country increased electricity tariffs on the famous bulb that lights up whenever someone suddenly gets an idea.

According to UMEME managing director Charles Chapman, the move is meant to curb the rate at which Ugandans are suddenly realizing how much the company is cheating them. “People are getting ideas that we are cheating by unnecessarily hiking power tariffs, which is true. But we don’t like it when people start making noise for us in the media and reporting us to the government. It means they are becoming clever,” he said.

He explained that since people were getting such brilliant ideas from the thought part of their brains, they decided to hike the already high cost of thinking in Uganda. “Whenever someone thinks of something sensible, it will most probably work against crooks like us. So we sat down and decided that everyone who wanted to think properly would have to pay double. The government fully supports us because the hike also works in their favour.”

Thinkers walk to UMEME to pay their bills

Chapman also warned those involved in thought theft to desist from the habit or face severe and hiked punishment. He noted that because thought power tariffs had been increased, some people were already resorting to using wires and other illegal methods to steal thoughts and ideas from their neighbours at night. “You can easily be ideacuted. It’s dangerous.”


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